Of Dogs and the Afterlife
I had a dream last night. My wife and I were in our kitchen and Edison appeared on our patio. I was so happy to see him. In my dream I knew he was dead and I kept thinking, "This must be a dream. This must be a dream."
Oh, but what a dream! My wife and I went onto the patio and greeted him the way you greet a dearly loved one who you haven't seen in too long, which he is. The dream was vivid - he looked, felt, and smelled like Edison. He was maybe slightly more subdued than he was, but other that, Edison was in my dream. My wife said, "Go get the boys." And I got up to go get them and then I woke up.
I was crying when I woke. A combination of dream-enhanced happiness, knowing even in the midst of it that it was going to be a fleeting moment, and being so vividly reminded of how much I love and miss him.
I'm a non-superstitious person and I'm familiar with the rational reasons behind dreams. Perhaps the dream was the result of my missing Edison so much. Maybe I've been dreaming about him a lot over the months since he died and I just happened to remember this one because I woke up during it. Or maybe my mind manufactured the dream to help me deal with the recent stresses and worries I've been dealing with.
The rational reasons fit the available facts and might be satisfying intellectually, but emotionally they really fail to deliver. There was something so moving about this dream that makes the rational explanations ring false. Despite my rational self, I prefer to believe that Edison actually visited me in a dream. That he sensed the stress and worries I've had lately, and he visited me from his well-earned afterlife of endless walks and doggie treats, to help me feel better. Pretty much the way he did when he was alive – by just being there and making me feel, for just a little while, like I'm the most awesome person in the universe. Or maybe he just wanted to let me know that he thinks of me too, the way I do him, and that in the end – whether the rational me believes in those kind of endings or not – it's all going to be okay.
Oh, but what a dream! My wife and I went onto the patio and greeted him the way you greet a dearly loved one who you haven't seen in too long, which he is. The dream was vivid - he looked, felt, and smelled like Edison. He was maybe slightly more subdued than he was, but other that, Edison was in my dream. My wife said, "Go get the boys." And I got up to go get them and then I woke up.
I was crying when I woke. A combination of dream-enhanced happiness, knowing even in the midst of it that it was going to be a fleeting moment, and being so vividly reminded of how much I love and miss him.
I'm a non-superstitious person and I'm familiar with the rational reasons behind dreams. Perhaps the dream was the result of my missing Edison so much. Maybe I've been dreaming about him a lot over the months since he died and I just happened to remember this one because I woke up during it. Or maybe my mind manufactured the dream to help me deal with the recent stresses and worries I've been dealing with.
The rational reasons fit the available facts and might be satisfying intellectually, but emotionally they really fail to deliver. There was something so moving about this dream that makes the rational explanations ring false. Despite my rational self, I prefer to believe that Edison actually visited me in a dream. That he sensed the stress and worries I've had lately, and he visited me from his well-earned afterlife of endless walks and doggie treats, to help me feel better. Pretty much the way he did when he was alive – by just being there and making me feel, for just a little while, like I'm the most awesome person in the universe. Or maybe he just wanted to let me know that he thinks of me too, the way I do him, and that in the end – whether the rational me believes in those kind of endings or not – it's all going to be okay.
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